Saturday, December 12, 2009

Potty Training 101 By Sadie


Now that I am potty trained my first attempt to relieve myself will be outside. Rule number one -you have exactly 10 seconds from the time I have decided I need to go until the time of my release to grant me access outside. If this allotted time expires I will find an alternate location of my choosing. This location will be discrete and can never be on an easily cleaned surface or you will never learn rule number one. This means that if my dog door is in anyway impeded, closed from the wind, or other elements and you don't notice me surveying the situation I will resort to option 2. Rule number two, if you actually manage to abide by rule number one and I relieve myself outside, when I come back inside I not only expect to be praised with enthusiasm and sincerity, but I will receive a treat of my liking. And not a crappy carrot treat, a real cookie. I will dock you 1 second for each breachment of this policy on the time limit you have in rule number one. If and when you have failed to abide by rule number 2 and have used up all 10 seconds given to you, I will resort back to being un-potty trained. This means that if you expect me to bathroom outside you will need to physically take me out and do the encouragement dance of shame for all the neighborhood to see. Obviously treats will follow. This will continue until I have decided that I am no longer un-potty trained and we can start back with rules one and two.

And I should mention that if there is too much snow on the ground, the wind is blowing too hard, the sun is shining too much, or I just feel like it, I will go where ever I want.

Thank-you for your attention to this sensitive manner,
Sadie

6 comments:

Beth said...

Fox Terriers are born with about 4 times as much original sin in them aren't they?!! Sadie, Sadie - what to do with you. I hope Santa doesn't read this.

Sarah said...

Sadie,

Jane understands ... I have to take her outside and we usually do the pee and the poo in 2 trips outside. both times hating it.

I'm not sure if she has ever pooped in the house ... as the evidence would be quickly gone thanks to a certain tri-coloured dog ...

i hope your mom continues to follow the rules Sadie :)

onecollie said...

hi Sandy & Sadie!
we missed hearing from you both!.....looking forward to more funny posts!

Diana said...

Too funny! Diaina

Crazy Dog Lady said...

Lol, Casey likes your thinking way of thinking Sadie!

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